by Caryl Teh

Have you ever been in this situation: your manager calls the team into a meeting, and gives a presentation. Along the way, you notice some questionable figures and inaccurate facts, and you have some suggestions that you think will make the final pitch even better. Your manager wraps up, turns to you and asks, “What do you think?”. With any other teammate, you’d feel freer to share your thoughts. But with your MANAGER??? (yikes!)

When you give feedback to a manager or someone else above you, it’s known as “upward feedback.” Let’s explore why it’s important and how we can do it better.

Why Upward Feedback is Valuable

In most teams, the further someone advances up the chain of command, the harder it is for them to get honest feedback. But no one can keep growing at work if they don’t know what they need to improve on, even managers! That’s why your feedback might actually be one of the most helpful things for them. Any manager who wants to be an effective leader will encourage feedback from their team, and take it seriously. 

How Do I Give Upward Feedback?

If upward feedback is so helpful, then why doesn’t it happen all the time? For many of you who work under a manager, you worry that your feedback taken the wrong way will land you in your boss’ bad books. After all, no matter how good your relationship is, your boss is still in a management position! So don’t worry, you’re not alone. Many people are nervous about giving upward feedback, and are tempted to lay low even when you have something important to share.

Feedback is a dish best served with respect and care. Here are some pointers to help you achieve that:

1. Approach your boss with respect

If your boss hasn’t made it clear that they welcome feedback, ask if they are open to it before you share. Even if they are receptive, always be sure to double-check just to make sure.

2. Keep It Objective

Good feedback should be based on data-driven observations – specific and objective. But remember that you may not have all the information, and might be missing important context for why your boss acted the way they did. So share your thoughts neutrally, but also ask and leave room for your boss to fill in the gaps and clear up any misunderstandings you might have had. 

3. Choose Your Words Carefully

HOW you give your feedback matters just as much as what you actually say, ie. tone and word choice. Use polite and professional language. While this may sound obvious, giving feedback can be emotional, especially if it’s in response to an upsetting or frustrating situation. 

If you want to remain calm and collected, it might help to write down what you want to say before speaking with your boss. Obviously, don’t read to your boss from a script—that could seem a little strange. But getting your thoughts down on paper can go a long way towards helping you articulate feedback the right way. Read back what you’ve written and look out for any loaded language — you want to avoid judgement words and stick to neutral, descriptive phrasing. Ask yourself: How would you feel receiving this feedback in their shoes? Would you feel attacked or judged? 

Remember, don’t let your emotions get in the way of communicating your feedback with care. Stay calm. You can do it.

4. Add Some Positivity

There’s no need for an upward feedback session to be just a list of negatives. Here are a few ways you can keep the conversation light, warm, and friendly: 

• Affirm things your boss did well. Unless you’re working for Lord Voldemort (in which case diplomatic phrasing is the least of your worries), you can always find something positive to comment on.
• Make sure to hold space for your boss to respond with their own feedback for you! This will steer the conversation in a more reciprocal direction. You want the feedback session to feel like a collaboration between you and your manager, rather than criticism or a lecture.
• Finally, end the conversation on a positive note by sincerely thanking your boss for listening to you. If they’re willing to absorb and grow from criticism, that’s indicative of a strong, trusting relationship. Make sure your boss knows how much that means to you!

Thoughtful Feedback Helps Everyone

Everyone deserves actionable feedback that helps them grow, even bosses and managers. If you’re nervous about giving upward feedback, following the steps shared here will make it clear to your boss that you’ve thought things through carefully, and that your goal is supported with positive intentions to improve your relationship. Now take courage, go on, and give it a try.

(P.s. if you found this article helpful, check back next week for some examples of what great feedback sounds like.)

Source:
Trello